Wednesday, April 18, 2012

The Hen Party - Part One

Every new bride goes through a rite of passage - The Hens Night, also referred to as The Bacherlorette Party. These events are stereotypically known as a pack of screechy whiny snorting woman staggering around shitfaced drunk, grabbing and groping anything that looks like a penis.

Now as I am a true lady, I wanted my Hen's Party to be a classy affair, suitable for my ladylike friends.

My Ladies in Waiting organised this event. Was I nervous?? Hell yeh!! I had played an evil role in organising their Hen's days and am ashamed to say, they all involved a pack of screechy whiny snorting shitfaced women obsessed with penises. I was expecting and dreading the same.

Should I expect it? Hell yeh!! They have every right to pay me back. I was frightened......

 Here is a list of what I want and DON'T FRIGGING WANT!!

YES to putting mud on my face and standing around looking lovely with my beautiful friends taking photos

NO to passing out and getting dressed up like a pig!

YES to glamorous hats and classy jokes about ladylike things

NO to enormous penises coming out or in windows!!!

YES to a microdermabrasion session and going out for some classy cocktails with my microdermabraised flawless friends

NO to Tequila Slammers and climbing on my friends back to hail a cab to the next nightclub!!

And then there's this - YES o r NO?? Well this lady won't say.....

Sooooooooo what did my Ladies in Waiting have in store for me?

Well all I knew, was that I was getting picked up at 8:30am and had to wear heels and a hat!!


  1. woah, your hen party looks muscular...

  2. Definite YES to the last - it's not a hen party otherwise girl!! With you on the pig one, no-one wants that! xx

  3. I cannot WAIT to hear the rest of this story!!!

  4. I think the heels and hat instructions are a good sign but I'm definitely interested to see what they had in store for you!

  5. I would want the best of both worlds. The classy should make sweet love to the raunchy.

  6. I hope it was a superiorly ladylike affair!
    (PS and all your NO photos are the reason I organised my own hen's night...)